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1919 · CLOSE READING

The Equinox (Volume III, Number I)

The Equinox (Volume III, Number I) (1919), PDF p. 168

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THE EQUINOX Apr. 13, 11.21-11.36 P.M. Dragon. A certain bliss arose at the thought that I was but a little child of the Great Father. Joy. Joy. (Yes: too emotional. O.M.) Apr. 19, 7.07 A.M. to 7.20 A.M. Not anything very definite. There is a certain quality of bliss about these practices which is peculiar to concentration but other- wise indescribable. (This is bad. You do things well, and work hard; but your point of view is all wrong. I feel a sort of sentimentality injuring your scientific attitude. O.M.) April 20, 2.40-3.10 P.M. Having left home about 2.15 I climbed up towards the mountain till I found a secluded spot; there I knelt down and did breathing exercise. Felt Prana all over body. Invoked Adonai and tried to unite with Him. A brilliant White light filled sphere of consciousness. Arose as Adonai, performed the Ritual of Pentagram, then prayed aloud and fluently, trying to unite consciousness with all Nature. Knelt again in Meditation, and arose much strengthened and with a feeling of the Divine Presence. (This is excellent for a beginner. But remember—all these divine illumina- tions are mere Breaks. O.M.) Note:—I find more and more difficulty in remembering any details of these practices the next day. Concentration was good. In this instance at end of practice could not remember what time I started, although I believe I am correct. I have thought several times lately about this loss of memory. Is it a result, or is it a fault? (It’s a good sign, as a rule. O.M.) May 9, 10.21-10.43 P.M. Dragon. Astral journey of no particular import. Can- not properly identify with image. Seem to see the image while acting in it. (This isn’t as bad as it sounds. Don’t worry, so long as the Image is quite sure of itself. O.M.) (This, by the way, would have been particularly helpful in- formation, and if Fra. V.I.O. had had it at the time he might have done a good many more Astral journeys. This lack of confidence at first seems to hold back many Students who could otherwise travel on the Astral quite success- fully. Ed.) May 21, 8.45 to 9.34 P.M.=49 Mins. Thumbs in ears; first 25 mins in Dragon. Then lying flat on back. Cramp in left foot on change of position. After the loud sounds subsided, became concentrated on ringing sound in left ear. Mind became calmer, and I heard the sound of a little silver bell, very clear and sweet, struck a number of times. This still in left ear. Then heard sound of metallic throbbing (if I can use the term) very faintly in right ear. 160
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