The Equinox (Volume III, Number I)

THE EQUINOX I feel a secret Joy to-night. The unaccountable inner Joy which transforms everything and frees the soul from its shackles. All seems so good to-night; this simple life, the tent by the sea, the night air, the happy tired feeling after the day’s work, the presence of my two dear ones, and all the dear ones of which I am a part, the presence of Adonai within and without. It is good to have lived for this. (This is dreadful! You must not mistake ‘feeling good’ for a mystic state. O.M.) Aug. 9, 9.59 to 10.26 P.M. During this meditation a certain magical under- standing arose whereby it was easy to interpret any common object into a symbol of the Work. (A bit better. O.M.) Aug. 18, 11.07 to 11.13 P.M. Even 6 mins is a difficulty now. When will the tide turn again! (The tides are due to the pull of the Sun and Moon. O.M.) Aug. 19, 7.32 to 7.42 P.M. Slight feeling of Joy. (Bother joy! O.M.) Aug. 25, 1.33 to 10.55 P.M. Changed my Asana once during practice and found I could move body without affecting the particular part which was in the calm state. (Good. O.M.) Aug. 26. A quiet evening at home, for which I am grateful. It seems as if so little is entered in this diary and so much remains unsaid. How one longs some- times to express things and thoughts and generally ends by some commonplace entry. I think to-night I will try a little more than usual. All this time I have been plodding on, having made up my mind to a course of action in accordance with my aspiration. Day after day I have continued until this round of existence has become almost a fixed habit. My times of meditation and practice have dwindled till they are somewhat short, but for all that, the main idea has never become clouded. I feel far more determined in every way than I did, although less certain of any fixed goal. I know also that I have problems to face, now, or in the future, but have learnt to keep doing what comes to hand, without wa- vering or despairing. I do not seem to have made much definite progress, yet there are signs which give me to understand that all is as it should be; perhaps Iam more in tune and so do not notice such vivid changes. I have found nature very fair and beautiful, this summer. I have got to love Her so much more than formerly. Then again, I have mastered Her a little more; I have learnt more of swimming, climbing, walking and other exercises through daily practice. I have made new friends, have learnt from them and taught them in return. All this, in spite of the limited existence of living in a tiny tent and often being 162