The Equinox (Volume III, Number I)

THE EQUINOX 8 P.M., Dec. 16. Have just been working out the meaning of the word obtained last night. I then thought the value was 507=“That which causes ferment” or 5 plus 7=12=He longed for, missed, etc. This shows how I went astray. I find however that the word actually adds to 607=Adam Primus. But 6 plus 7=13 Unity, Love, and The Tarot Trump is DEATH, and this is what he said he was writing. (Note Apr. 21, 1917. Ha=The Sun; tha=The Moon, as stated in the Hatha-Yoga Pradipiha.) . (Well worked out, method good; but not much of a place to have reached. You should have got more of the book, too. O.M.) Dec. 18th. Note. There is one thing I had intended to mention before. Instead of sleeping deeply, as was my former habit, I have lately noticed quite a change in this respect. Sometimes, though resting, I retain consciousness most of the night. In this state I appear to think very much along the same lines as I do in ordinary waking consciousness. In the morning I have the ability to change from one state to the other quite easily, but on leaving the bed and becoming fully awakened I can seldom remember any particulars of what occurred dur- ing sleep. (This sounds good, as if the Tamo-Guna were breaking up. O.M.) Dec. 19, 11.38. Prayer and Meditation. Felt ‘informed’ by that Greater Self that Humility, Patience and Selflessness would bring the condition required. Dwelt for awhile in that Boundless Silence of which words can express nothing. (Humility, like Pride, implies a self. O.M.) Dec. 26th, 11.3 to 11.20 P.M. Meditation. Gradually separating the Self from the body, mind, life, death, etc., till an entirely impersonal state resulted. (These things don’t mean much, as a rule. They are only what we call ‘reverie,’ a dulcet meandering of the mind. O.M.) Dec. 27th, 11.13 to 11.30 P.M. Meditation. After striving to unite consciousness completely with Adonai, the sphere of Consciousness widened out and became one with the Many; so that, when asking of the Self: “What am I? Who am I?” this no longer seemed an individual question, but to be taken up by many units in all parts of space, yet upon a formless plane. I rose higher and tried to unify all these; this resulted in an absolutely impersonal state which continued even after the meditation was over until about 12 o’clock. While it lasted it was dis- tinctly different from any former experience, especially the earlier part. (Not very good; seems too much like thinking. O.M.) 168