BALLADE OF THE ONE-EYED TOUT
O SOLITARY-EYED one, who
Sportest a Diamond Jubilee
Tie, of pure white and red and blue,
Or something green, like absinthee,
Or purple like a purple bee,
If bees are purple, which I doubt.
O product of the Varsity,
Thou dear and noble! one-eyed tout!
Whom dost thou cadge for? For I view
With envy thy sweet liberty.
Thy tie’s invariably new,
Although thy face we never see
_Even on Sunday changed! Ah me!
That face, at which the lilies pout,
That face extraordinararee,
Thou dear and noble one-eyed tout.
Fragrant as dawn and light as dew
Thy dainty presence! Or a tree
Some poets would compare thee to:
Some poets to a common flea.
1 Mr Robert Browning, not the author, is responsible for this iniquitous
conjunction of epithets.
Cc 3