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…2 BALLADE OF NEW CRITICISM Has forgotten the venom we knew ; Nor sting as those articles stang When Keats wrote a poem or two Before the good zon of Lang. L’ENVOI There is a young lady, it’s true, Who finds that their tongues have a tang But—the sorrows of Satan were few Before the good zon of Lang.
…ELL Now, ere our last sun sinks in red, Clasp hands in friendship, ere we die, Nor shame us if a tear be shed :— The time has come tosay Good-bye. ENVOI Prince, whether in Life’s Tripos classed Or ploughed quite irretrievably, Our friendship for all time is cast. The time is come to say Good-bye.
…dead. The springtime of our youth is fled, And Summer comes too fierce and dry. With pale cheek and averted head The time is come to say Good-bye. On Life’s rough road we travel fast ; Some to be great, and some to wed. We are small men, the world is vast ; With our desires God is not fed. Some wield gold swords, or steel, or lead ; Some lose good heart, lay weapons by. Each lies in his own self-made bed. The time is come to say Good-bye. May God defend us from the blast, And smooth our path, and keep our head ! Be with us when we stand aghast,…
…riolic review. Corroding the centuries through, It eats since the first poet sang, And they cursed him, and called him a Jew, Before the good zon of Lang. These critics (their style, you remark, Into forests of verbiage grew) Ere Carroll invented the Snark Were ready to eat me and you ; They snorted, they snapped, and they slew, They were mighty of quill and of slang, Till they quenched the Philistian crew Before the good zon of Lang. Here’s an article mystic and dark In a manner as fluent as glue, Which (though lovers meet deep in a park, The …
Let no man shout before the wood Encloseth him no more ; Nor gaily say his gamp is good Before the heavens pour. Let no man say “I go to climb A ridge of danger dread !” But wait till that successful time, And say “I have!” instead! 53
28 BALLADE OF CAMBRIDGE PAPERS Of Pedantry on which is spread No butter of Good Style undue; Before one’s eyes the types unread Dance until everything is blue. ENVOI Prince, of three bads who wants the best ? Off, Granta, Cantab, and Review! Stick to the “ Mag” and let the rest Dance until everything is blue!
… Springs of poetry, Thou dear and noble one-eyed tout! ENVOI How fortunate that very few Can chatter on like this, about Nothing at all! Good-bye to you, O dear and noble one-eyed tout.
36 BALLADE OF LAWN TENNIS And a very good piece of advice it was too (Chorus, please!) The score of life is at Love-all. ENVOI Nothing is like leather. The rhyme is passable—a task by no means small. Though its connection is certainly not obvious—still our cap has lost no feather :— Done it, by Jupiter! We can only say farewell, gentle reader, impressing on you the truth (put in Tennis language because this ballade is all about Tennis) that the score of life is at Love-all.
…ad “ Félise” or any thing That naughty Mr Swinburne scribbles ; The human heart with love enring ; Don’t dig right into it with dibbles! Good luck, my lass, you now your way can see! —I feared she might have taken me to Replenish the unusual vacancy ; And I have other things to see to.
…m the otherwise dull pages of the “ Granta,” “Cantab,” “Cam- bridge Magazine,” “Silver Crescent,” and other tony sheets. [Tony sheets is good, and free from the no ‘count English accent.] People who wanted to read them had to buy these papers, which were messy and lumpy, while the reader’s attention was unpleasantly distracted by the dung heap on which these pearls were cast. This volume meets the crying need of millions of what some people w// call “undergrads.” The price for Cash will be One Shilling, for Credit One Thousand Guineas, in the p…
…f the map, Your face with the sunlight is browned, You smile when boys shout, with a clap,! Hi, Mister, your wheel’s goin’ round !” Thus good is the converse of ill (Such truths are the moralist’s pap), And turbot makes excellent brill ; Verse goes with a tang and a snap. 1 The phrase is adverbial.
…awa little salary; And I would one day eventually most graciously let loose a thought On some subject such as Maeterlinck or Malory. But good-bye to thoughts of greatness amid men of Major Schol. degree! It’s the first step that regards me with defiance; They’ll allow me, p’raps, the General, or possibly the Poll Degree, , For my papers in the Trip. of Moral Science. So I, who might have risen to the fame of such a man as Hobbes, Or Leibnitz, or St Paul, or Dr Whewell, Remain a mediocrity (excuse a water-can 0’ sobs!) Exactly for my excellence—…
… back; the rhymes’ll get worse for certain, so don’t be surprised if they do, but I haven’t lost hope of sticking to grammar yet.] It is goodly and glad to see Gilbert express his poetic regret. I can find nothing better to add than that the son of Kish was Saul :— Good Gilbert’s forgotten again! The piece of advice he had in his mind was “ Trust Heaven and distrust Baphomet !”