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Page 1 of 21909 · PDF PAGE 137
I 240. 7-55- 9.20. JOHN ST. ]ΟΗΝ The dead man Ankh-af-na—khonsu Hath parted from the darkling crowds, Hath joined the dwellers of the light, Opening Duant, the star-abodes ; Their keys receiving. The dead man Ankh-af-na-khonsu Hath made his passage into night, His pleasure on the earth to do Among the living. Amen Amen without lie Amen, and Amen of Amen. I shall lie down to sleep in my robes, still wearing the Ring of the Masters, and bearing my wand in my hand. For to me now sleep is the same as waking, and life the same as death. In Thy L.V.X…
1909 · PDF PAGE 100
… awakened. The last entry should extend to 3.30 or thereabouts; probably later; for, invoking Adonai, he again got the beginnings of the Light, and the “telephone-cross" voices very strongly. But this time he was fortunately able to concentrate on Adonai with some fervour, and these things ceased to trouble. But the Perfume and the Vision came not, nor any full manifestation of the L.V.X., the Secret Light, the light that shineth in darkness. John St. John is again very sleepy. He will try and concentrate on Adonai without doing Pranayama——— mu…
1909 · PDF PAGE 135
…ing the Images, destroying the Images, that Himself might arise in me. And the Chamber was filled with that wondrous glow of ultra-violet light self-luminous, without a source, that hath no counterpart in Nature unless it be in that Dawn of the North. . . . And there were revealed unto me certain Words of Power . . . And I invoked my Lord and recited the Book Ararita at the Altar . . . This holy inspired book (delivered unto me in the winter of last year) was now at last understanded of me; for it is, though I knew it not, a complete scheme of t…
1909 · PDF PAGE 112
… silence and in dark- ness, and let 0. M. be found watching and waiting and willing Thy Presence. Adonai! Adonai! Ο Lord Adonai! Let Thy Light illumine the Path of that darkling wight John St. John, that being who, separate from Thee, is separate from all Light, Life, Love. Adonai! Adonai! let it be written of 0. M. that " the Lord Adonai is about him like a thunderbolt and like a Pylon and like a Serpent and like a Phallus—and in the midst thereof like the Woman that jetteth the Milk
1909 · PDF PAGE 136
…e the earth. Therefore with sweetness ineffable He parted from me ; yet leaving acomfort not to be told, aPeace . . . the Peace. And the Light and the Perfume do certainly yet remain with me in the little Chamber, and I know that my Redeemer liveth, and that He shall stand at the latter day upon the earth. For I am He that liveth, and was dead; and behold! I am alive for evermore, and have the Keys of Hell and of Death. I am Amoun the Sun in His rising; I have passed from darkness into Light. Iam Asar Un—nefer the Perfected One. I am the Lord o…
1909 · PDF PAGE 123
…vian. Am quite washed—out. I have not even the courage of despair. There is not enough left in me to despair. I don’t care. One gleam of light illumines the dark path—I can’t enjoy my dinner. The snails, as I prong them forth, are such ugly, slimy, greasy black horrors—oh! so like my soul! . . . Ugh! I write a letter to F broken pentagram. It makes me think of a “ busted flush.” . . . But through all the sunlight peeps: e.g., These six snails were my six inferior souls; the seventh, the real soul, cannot be eaten by the devourer. How’s that for …
1909 · PDF PAGE 91
…Kether, the Thaumiel, twin giant heads that hate and tear each other. For the horror and darkness have been unbelievable; yet again, the light and brilliance have been almost in- supportable. I was never so far, and never so near . . . But the hour approaches. Let me collect myself, and begin the new day in affirmation of my Unity with my Lord Adonai I The Eighth Day Thus the Eighth day, the Second Week, begins. I am in Asana. For some reason or other, Pranayarna is quite easy. Concentrating on Adonai, Iwas in Kam- bhakham for a whole minute wi…
1909 · PDF PAGE 42
… sure sign when one sees a person take up fads that he is under the black rule of Apophis. In the Kingdom of Osiris there is freedom and light. To-day I shall eat neither with the frank gluttony of Isis nor with the severe asceticism of Apophis. I shall eat as much and as little as I fancy; these violent means are no longer necessary. Like Count Fosco, I shall “go on my way sustained by my sublime confidence, self-balanced by my impenetrable calm." I have spent half an hour wandering in the Musée du Luxembourg. I now sit down to meditate on this…
1909 · PDF PAGE 12
…s deeper than the night. I then consecrated myself to the Operation; cutting the Tonsure upon my head, a circle, as it were to admit the light of infinity: and cutting the cross of blood upon my breast, thus symbolising the equilibration of and the slaying of the body, while loosing the blood, the first projection in matter of the universal Fluid. The whole formulating the Ankh—the Key of Life! Igave moreover the signs ofthe grades from 0° =o°to7": 4°. Then did I take upon myself the Great Obligation as follows : I. I, O.M. &c., a member of the B…
1909 · PDF PAGE 104
…s latter view is suggested by the Rosicrucian formula of Reception: May thy mind be open unto the Higher! May thy heart be the Centre of Light ! May thy body be the Temple of the Rosy Cross ! and by the Hindu statement that in the attainedYogin
1909 · PDF PAGE 101
…tely), John St. John got into his pose, and began going for the gloves. The Interior Trembling began, and the room filled with the Subtle Light. He was within an ace of Concentration; the Violet Lotus of Ajna appeared, flashing like some marvellous comet; the Dawn began to break, as he slew with the Lightning-Flash every thought that arose in him, especially this Vision of Ajna; but fear —dread fear !—gripped his heart. Annihilation stood before him, annihilation of John St. John that he had 99
1909 · PDF PAGE 26
…everything with- out seeing it. Ο coffeel By the mighty Name of Power do I invoke thee, consecrating thee to the Service of the Magic of Light. Let the pulsations of my heart be strong and regular and slow! Let my brain be wakeful and active in its supreme task of self-control! That my desired end may be effected through Thy strength, Adonai, unto Whom be the Glory for ever! Amen without lie, and Amen, and Amen of Amen. I now proceed to the Hammam.? ,.ס11 24
1909 · PDF PAGE 54
… did thirty-two cycles, easy and pleasant; could have gone on indefinitely. The muscles went rigid, prac— tically of their own accord; so light did I feel that I almost thought myself to be “that wise one ” who “can balance himself on his thumb.” Sleep is con- quered right away from the word “jump.” Indeed, if Satan trembles when he sees The weakest saint upon his knees ; then surely : Satan flees, exclaiming “ Damn !" When any saint starts Pranayam ! So happy, indeed, was I in the practice that I devoted myself by the Waiting formula to Adonai ;…
1909 · PDF PAGE 106
…ng many leaks ; the waters of the False Sea foam over the bow, ride and carry the quarter—is he perchance already wrecked, his hopeless plight con- cealed from him as yet by his own darkness? For, dazzled as he is by the blinding brilliance of this morning’s Spiritual Sun, which yet he beheld but darkly, to him now even the light of earth seems dark. Reason the rudder was long since unshipped; the power 01 his personality has broken down, yet under the tiny storm-sail 01 his Will to Adonai, the crazy bark holds way, steered by the car of Discip…
1909 · PDF PAGE 107
… out that " The most mystic of discourses informs us—His wholeness is in the Supra—Mundane Order ; for there a Solar World and Boundless Light subsist, as the Oracles of the Chaldeans affirm.” Not very helpful, is it? As if divination could ever help on such exalted planes ! As if the trumpery elementals that operate these things possessed the Secrets of the Destiny of an Adept, or could help him in his agony! For this reason, divination should be discarded from the start : it is only a “ mere toy, the basis of mercenary fraud ” as Zoroaster mor…
1909 · PDF PAGE 44
THE EQUINOX 1.40. to recapitulate L.V.X. Lux, the Light of the Cross). 1.55. 3-55- 42 Thence one might proceed to some symbolic passage through the 6“: 5° grade—though of course that grade is really symbolic of this soul—journey, not vire versui— and through 7°=4° ; so perhaps—-if one could only dare to hope it !—to the 8°=3° attainment Certainly what little I have done so far pertains no higher than Minor adeptship, though I have used higher formula: in the course of my working. My Prana is acting in a feverish manner ; a mixture of fatigue an…
1909 · PDF PAGE 51
…o do so would be to inflict some torture whose severity one could not gauge at the time: e.g., one might dip oneself in petroleum and set light to it, as the young lady mystic did—I suppose in Brittany l—the other day. It’s not the act that hurts, but the consequences; so, although one knows only roughly what will happen, one can force oneself to the act. This, then, is a possible form of self-martyrdom. Similarly, mutilations; though it is perhaps just to observe that all these people are mad when they do these things, and their standard 01 ple…
1909 · PDF PAGE 105
…ed to fill his Malkuth, vacated by the purified Nephesch which has gone up to live in Tiphereth. Or so O.M. read it. The other idea of the Light descending and filling each principle with its glory is, it seems to him, less fertile, and less in accord with any idea of Evolution. (What would Judas McCabbage think ?) And one can so readily understand how tremendous a task is that of the postulant, since he has to glorify and initiate all his principles and train them to their new and superior tasks. This surely explains better the terrible dangers o…
1909 · PDF PAGE 94
…. 4.15. 92 THE EQUINOX that before I reach those gates the whole sky may be one black flame 01 thundercloud, and the violet swords of the lightning may split asunder its heavy womb, and the rain, laughing like a young child, may dance upon the desert! The Light beginneth to dawn upon the Path, so that I see a little better where I stand. This whole journey seems under some other formula than IAO—perhaps a Pentagram formula with which I am not clearly acquainted. If I knew the Word of the Grade, I could foretell things: but I don’t. I think I wil…
1909 · PDF PAGE 111
… fight. It may have been a snare—~may the Lord Adonai keep him in the Path. Adonai! Adonai! (P.S.—Add that the “ultra-violet” or “astral” light in the room was such that it seemed bright as daylight. He hath never seen the like, even in the ceremony which he performed in the Great Pyramid of Gizeh.) 11.14- Ο. Μ. then passed from vision unto vision of un— II.34. exampled splendour. The infinite abyss of space, a rayless orb of liquid and colourless brilliance fading beyond the edges into a flame of white and gold. . . . The Rosy Cross flashing with …