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Page 1 of 31909 · PDF PAGE 126
…energy, in a way; and in this particular case it is the one thing that is not Adonai (whatever else may be) and so the antithesis of the Work. Bricks without straw, indeed] That’s nothing to it. This job is like being asked to judge a Band contest and being told that one may do anything but listen. Only worse! One could form some idea of how they were playing through other senses; in this case every faculty is the enemy of the Work. At first sight the problem seems insoluble. It may be so, for me. At least, I have not solved it. Yet I have come …
1909 · PDF PAGE 8
…ins into the hands of others that I have written this record, not without pain. Others, reading it, will see the sort of way one sets to work ; they will imitate and improve upon it; they will attain to the Magistry; they will prepare the Red Tincture and the Elixir of Life—for they will discover what Life means.
1909 · PDF PAGE 59
…ntrating solely on the Revision and copying of the Ritual. Therefore I now live just as I always live in order to get a definite piece of work done: concentrating as it were 017 the Work. As Levi also adjures us by the Holy Names. Coming back from lunch (a dozen Marennes Vertes and an Andouillette aux Pommes) I met Zelina Visconti, more lovely-ugly than ever in her wild way. She says that she is favourably disposed towards me, on the recommendation of her concierge ! l! " The tongue of good report hath already been heard in his favourl Advance, …
1909 · PDF PAGE 46
…any odd things, necessary as they may have been. I had better take a solid hour willing the Tryst with Adonai. Have done all this, and a Work of Kindness. I will again revise the new ritual, dine, return and copy it fair for use. Let Adonai the Lord oversee the Work, that it be per- fect, a sure link with Him, a certain and infallible Conjuration, and Spell, and Working of true Magick Art, that I may invoke Him with success whenever seemeth good unto Him. Unto Him; not unto Me! Is it not written that Except Adonai build the House, they labour i…
1909 · PDF PAGE 62
…performing a ritual in one’s Astral Body, so called. For one is on the same plane as the things one’s dealing with. If, however, serious work is wanted, one must be all there. To get “ materialised " “spirits "—pardon the absurd language !——one should (nay, must I) work inside
1909 · PDF PAGE 119
…nestly, he is now so blind that he cannot tell! Perhaps a “cafe, cognac, et Cigare” may tune him up to the point of either going back to work, or across Paris to the Hammam. He will make the experiment, reading through his proofs the while. One good thing; the Chittam is moving slowly. The waiters all hurry him—what a contrast to last night l Proofs read through again. John St. John feels far from well. A stroll down the Boul’ Mich’ and avisit to M—’s studio improve matters a good deal. The cure continued. No worry about the Work, but an effort…
1909 · PDF PAGE 98
… Way of Truth! . . . Iwill return and humble myself before the Lord Adonai. Home again ; have done odd necessary things, and am ready to work. I feel slack; and I feel that I have been slack, though probably the Record shows a fair amount of work done. But I am terribly bruised by the Great Fall; these big things leave the body and mind no worse, apparently ; but they hurt the Self, and later that is reflected into the lower parts of the man as insanity or death. I must attain, or . . . an end of John St. John. An end of him, one way or the othe…
1909 · PDF PAGE 117
… be for the King’s Banqueting-House or for the Headsman and the Block? Breakfast—croissant, sandwich, 2 coffees. Concen- trating !?#”the Work as well as possible. Arrived at Brenner’s studio. The rest has produced one luminous idea: why not end it all with destruction ? Say a great ritual of Geburah, curses, curses, curses! John St. John ought not to have forgotten how to curse. In his early days at Wastdale Head people would travel miles to hear him! Curse all the Gods and all the demons—all those things in short which go to make up John St. J…
1909 · PDF PAGE 134
…absolute indication is: on no account live otherwise than alone. But it is 1035; these considerations, though in a way pertaining to the Work, are not the Work itself. Let me begin to inflame myselfinfraying! The Twelfth Day When therefore I had made ready the chamber, so that all was dark, save for the Lamp upon the Altar, I
1909 · PDF PAGE 24
…- idea? Or did I at that time unconsciously think of my throat for some other reason? Bother! These things are all dog-faced demons ! Το work ! Work: Meditation and Mantra. No good. Went off into a reverie about a castle and men-at—arms. This had all the qualities of a true dream, yet I was not in any other sense asleep. I soon will be, though. It seems foolish to persist.
1909 · PDF PAGE 120
…10. 118 THE EQUINOX One might justly object to any Results of this Ten days’ strain. But if abundant health and new capacity to do great work be the after—effect, who then will dare to cast a stone? Not that it matters a turnip—top to the Adept himself. But others may be deterred from entering the Path by the foolish talk of the ignorant, and thus may flowers be lost that should go to make the fadelesswreath of Adonai. Ah, Lord, pluck me up utterly by the root, and set that which Thou pluckest as a flower upon Thy brow! Walked back to the Dome to…
1909 · PDF PAGE 63
JOHN ST. JOHN 12.45. one’s body. So, too, I think, for the highest spiritual work ; for that Work extends from Malkuth to Kether. Here is the great value of the rationalistic Eastern systems. [P.S. Of course scientifically worked with pencil, note-book, and stop-watch. The Yogi is usually in practice just as vague a dreamer as the mystic] They keep one always balanced by common sense. One might go off on lines of pleasing illusion for years, until one was lost on the ”Astral Plane.” All this, observe, is very meaningless, very vague at the best.…
1909 · PDF PAGE 33
…ling the House of God. Not so easy! the damned thing runs on like a prairie fire. Important then to stop it absolutely at will : even the Work itself may become an obsession. I 1 hours with no real break—not bad. The bad part of to-day seems the Asana, and the deadness. Or, perhaps worse, I fail to apprehend the true magical purport of my work: hence all sort of aimless formulae, leading—naturallyenough—to no result. It just strikes me—it may be this Isis Apophis Osiris IAO formula that I have preached so often. Certainly the first two days were …
1909 · PDF PAGE 19
…0. 12.28. 12.33. JOHN ST. JOHN The Second Day The Stroke of Twelve found me duly in my Asana, practising Pranayama. Let me continue this work ; for it is written that unto the persevering mortal the Blessed Immortals are swift . . . What then should happen to a persevering Immortal like myself? Trying meditation and mantra. I find thoughts impossible to concentrate; and my Asana, despite various cowardly attempts to "fudge” it, is {rightfully painful. In Hanged Man posture, meditating and willing the Presence of Adonai by the Ritual “Thee I invo…
1909 · PDF PAGE 15
…ped not from fatigue but from lunch. [Odd memoranda during lunch. Insist on pupils writing down their whole day; the play as well as the work. “By this means they will become ashamed, and prate no longer of ‘beasts.’ "] Ι am now well away on the ascetic current, devising all sorts of privations and thoroughly enjoying the idea. Having finished a most enjoyable lunch, will drink coffee and smoke, and try and get a little sleep. Thus to break up sleep into two shifts. A nice sleep. Woke refreshed. Am arrived home, having performed a little busines…
1909 · PDF PAGE 71
…re, it seems unlikely that mere exuberance of the former can excite the latter. In other words there is probably some first matter of the work which is not anything we know of as bodily. On my return to London, I must certainly put the matter before more experienced mathematicians, and if possible, get a graphic analysis of the kind in- dicated.] How difficult and expensive it is to get drunk, when one is doing magic ! Nothing exhilarates or otherwise affects one. Oh, the pathos and tragedy of those lines : Come where the booze is cheaper ! Come …
1909 · PDF PAGE 122
…by “I” is meant John St. John, or O. M., or Adonai according to the context. Have read some of THE Books to induct myself again into the Work. Therefore will I kindle the holy Incense, and turn myself again to the One Thought.
1909 · PDF PAGE 58
… and if I had not been a worm would have scattered it like chaff I ,, IV. δὲhours ; and I wake fresh. ,, V. I%+4§+ I hour; and real good work done in the intervals. [P.S. ,, VI. Probably 4 hours. ,, VII. 2+2+§ hours. ,, VIII. 6 hours much broken. ,, IX. 112—4-2—0-2 hours. ,, X. 4+ 1}; hours. ,, XI. 1%+4-21 hours. ,, XII. Back tothe normal—7 hours perfect sleep]
1909 · PDF PAGE 9
…ere a flower the particular kind of Energy—Sammavayamo—Which gives alike the desire to perform more definitely and exclu- sively the Great Work, and the capacity to achieve success. It is in any case remarkable that I was born in October (IS—); suffered the terrible mystic trance which turned me toward the Path in October (IS—); applied for admission to G D in October (18—); opened my temple at B—e in 7
1909 · PDF PAGE 128
…26 Path. The upshot is that it does not matter. Acquire full power of Concentration; the rest is only leather and prunella. Don’t worry; work! I shall now make a pantacle to aid the said faculty of concentration. The Voice 01 the Nadi (by the way) is resoundingwell, and the Chittam is a little better under control. Have worked well on the Pantacle, thinking of Adonai. Of course we are now reduced to a “low anthropo- morphic conception ”—but what odds ? Once the Right Thought comes it will transcend any and all conceptions. The objection is as s…