Thelema ScholarTHE ALEISTER CROWLEY COLLECTION
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1929 · PDF PAGE 312

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…ay hear the voice of the Neschamah. We may now consider further what is meant by Neschamah. It is the human faculty corresponding to the idea Binah. Understanding; which is that aspect of the divine consciousness which corresponds to the Female Idea. It receives, formulates and transmits the pure divine consciousness, which is represented by a triangle (for the Trinity) whose apex is the essence of the true self (corresponding to Brahman, Atman, Allah etc. --- not to Jehovah, who is the Demiurge) and whose other angle is Chiah, the Masculine as…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 503

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…t into "a white ash", which ash is preserved in an Urn. It is difficult to convey the appropriateness of this symbolism, but the general idea is that the earthly or receptive part of the Master is destroyed. That which remains has passed through fire; and is therefore, in a sense, of the nature of fire. The Urn is engraved with a word or symbol expressive of the nature of the being whose ash is therein. The Magus is thus, of course, not a person in any ordinary sense; he represents a certain nature or idea. To put it otherwise, we may say, the …

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1929 · PDF PAGE 140

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…f this trance is likely to upset the whole moral balance of the student. He often attributes and exaggerated importance to the imperfect ideas which represent his memory of what happened. He cannot possibly remember the thing itself, because his mind lacks the machinery of translating it into normal thought. These ideas are naturally his pet delusions. They seem to him to have become armed with supreme spiritual sanction, so he may be come a fanatic or a megalomaniac. In my system the pupil is taught to analyse all ideas and abolish them by phi…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 120

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…which various sacred words were entered, not alphabetically, but according to their numerical value. I must explain that the fundamental idea of the Cabbala is that the universe may be regarded as an elaboration of the numbers from 0 to 10, arranged in a certain geometrical design and connected by twenty-two "paths".1 The problem is to acquire perfect comprehension of the essential nature of these numbers. Every phenomenon, every idea, may be referred to one or more numbers. Each is thus, so to say, a particular modification of the pure idea. S…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 519

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

… miserably thin, for the element which it is most important to suppress is originality as such, even when the question concerns the very idea of craftsmanship in itself. The idea at the back of puritanism is the reduction of the mass of humanity to a degree of slavery which has never previously been so much as contemplated by the most malignant tyrants in history; for it aims at completing the helplessness of the workman by minimizing his capacity. He must no more be permitted to exercise the creative craftsmanship involved in making a pair of …

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1929 · PDF PAGE 322

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…e right on general principles, as I had done when Rose herself had told me how to invoke Horus; and I had not learned the lesson that my idea of "general Principles" was not reliable. The entry of April 24th shows how admirably the gods arrange one's affairs. One may have a perfectly right idea, but as long as one holds to it they will take pains to upset the apple cart: abandon the idea, and they immediately hand it back with a charming compliment. This is the lesson of the Book of Job. I quote the entry in full, concealing only the name of th…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 160

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

160 to analyse and measure him. Once an idea is intelligently grasped, it ceases to threaten the mind with the terrors of the unknown. I went to Delhi on the sixteenth. The best thing here is the Turkish bath, where the process of purification is completed by charming ladies. On the eighteenth I wrote about Orpheus, "The accursed Book III utterly finished. Oh Book IV! On the nineteenth I went and saw the fort with "Major Graham, a prize fool from South Africa". The entry demands emendation. He wasn't a major; his name wasn't Graham; he had neve…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 180

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…ty. The instinct which makes us sympathize with ArsŠne Lupin, Raffles and Co. is universal. Unfortunately, in the West, we have lost the idea of the just despot. Our judges seem to derive cynical amusement from contemplating the absurdities and abominations which result from formal fidelity to the law. We have lost sight of the fact that law is essentially no more than a generalized statement of prevailing customs. This is so true that it is fair to say that abstract ideas of justice have little to do with primitive legislation; the idea is onl…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 504

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…tand what was happening to him in this initiation --- his life from 1914 to 1919. The Grade of Magus is traditionally connected with the idea of the number 2; male creative energy, wisdom and the expression of a single idea in terms of duality. It transmits the idea of the divine unity to its feminine counterpart, the understanding, somewhat as a man transmits the essence of his racial character to his wife so that he perceives his inmost nature, itself unintelligible to him directly, by observing the flowering of that essence in his son. The H…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 137

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…e in being under the constant vigilant supervision of Allan Bennett, whose experience enabled him to detect the firs onset of disturbing ideas. For instance, the revising and typing of Tannhäuser were quite sufficient to distract my mind from meditation, and would even upset me in such apparently disconnected matters as Pranayama. It is easy to understand that a heavy meal will interfere with one's ability to control one's respiration; but one is inclined to laugh at the Hindu theory that it can be affected by such things as casual conversation…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 58

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

58 and so on. In this way I obtained a much more comprehensive idea of these men than if I had, as people usually do, picked out the masterpieces. I was very anxious that my style should not be influenced by my contemporaries, and also not to waste myself on anybody who had not stood the test of time. I made it a rule to read no one who had not been dead for fifty years, unless brought under my notice in some special way. For example, I could not avoid Swinburne, as one of my friends was crazy about him and I could not doubt, after the first ac…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 27

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

… middle name. I cannot account for it at all satisfactorily. I had been perfectly genuine in my ambition to lead a life of holiness; the idea of intimate communion with "Jesus" was constantly present to my mind. I do not remember any steps in the volte-face. I asked one of the masters one day how it was that Jesus was three days and three nights in the grave, although crucified on Friday and risen again on Sunday morning. He could not explain and said that it had never been explained. So I formulated the ambition to become a shining light in Ch…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 475

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

475 nothing by the hazy idea common to most Englishmen, including those who have studied Ireland most profoundly, that it was a devil of a mess and a devil of a nuisance. However, {750} Viereck wanted to believe; and he believed, like a Catholic who is afraid to sleep in the dark. Having thus established myself as an Irish rebel and a pro-German, I went away and considered what I could do about it. I read The Fatherland; I found the German case presented with learning, with logic and with moderation. The motifs were scholarship, statistics and …

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1929 · PDF PAGE 243

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…f Song, the Book of the Goetia of Solomon the King, Why Jesus Wept, Oracles, Orpheus, Gargoyles and The Collected Works. I had simply no idea of business. Besides this, I was in no need of money; my responsibility to the gods was to write as I was inspired; my responsibility to mankind was to publish what I wrote. But it ended there. As long as what I wrote was technically accessible to the public through the British Museum, and such places, my hands were clean. And yet I took a course implying a diametrically opposite state of mind. I printed …

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1929 · PDF PAGE 149

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…ristmas Eve and Easter Day at Tuticorin. I was criticizing it in the light of my experience in Dhyana, and the result was to give me the idea of answering Browning's apology for Christianity by what was essentially a parody of his title and his style. My poem was to be called "Ascension Day and Pentecost". I wrote "Ascension Day" at Madura on November 16th and 'Pentecost" the day after; but my original idea gradually expanded. I elaborated the two poems from time to time, added "Berashith" --- of which more anon --- and finally "Science and Bud…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 59

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…urney which worked wonders in enlarging my outlook on the world. {115} The passion for travel was already very strong in me. Home was my idea of hell; and London itself had a sordid aspect which never appealed to me. The idea of wickedness in London is connected with that of shame, and besides this there are certainly excellent reasons for a poet to feel unhappy there. To begin with, I can't stand the climate. I have known rare days in May and June when youth pays a fleeting visit to town, when the sunlight excites and the breeze braces one. It…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 536

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…er for their own sake or for that of others, in any allowable sense. They wanted more social success. Nobody seemed to have the faintest idea of what is really meant by knowledge and power. Some seemed anxious to help the progress of humanity; but here again, the wish was partly a puff-ball of pride, partly a maudlin sentiment such as one finds in servants' hall novelettes. The ignorance of all, without exception, was simply without limit. It {845} was rare to find a man who knew so much as the names of the most famous classics. Their ignorance…

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1929 · PDF PAGE 419

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

…rance is evidence of impotence. I brought off an astounding double event in Paris, probably during August. I was at 50 rue Vavin and the idea of a dramatic poem or allegory to be {668} called "Adonis" came into my mind. I went out for a citron pressé at the Café do Dôme de Montparnasse, preliminary to settling down to write. The argument was almost complete in my mind and the rhythm was beginning to flow through me. But at the Dôme were sitting my old mistress, Nina Olivier, and her latest conquest, an unpleasant and cadaverous hypocrite named …

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1929 · PDF PAGE 434

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

… The editor protested that it was rather rough luck on a kid to predict such misfortunes for it. In other words, he had not the remotest idea what the poem was about. Considering that this particular editor is quite justly reputed to be far and away the best man in England in the matter of appreciating first-class work, it is perfectly incomprehensible to me that he should be such an arrant blockhead. Most of my time in 1912 was taken up by the O.T.O. The Order was a great success and ceremonies of initiation were of almost daily occurrence. I …

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1929 · PDF PAGE 533

Confessions of Aleister Crowley

533 constantly shirked re-writing. I pulled myself together and went down to Atlantic City for the purpose of getting this done. My idea was to write it inspirationally; which is correct. The only drawback was that the inspiration was forced and feeble. I know now that the writing of this Comment must be a definite miracle, parallel with that of the production of the Book itself. I stumbled on through the Desert somehow. Even today I hardly understand the object of the ordeals of this journey. At the beginning of the next Chokmah day I found my…

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