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Page 1 of 61922 · PDF PAGE 315
Out of Harm's Way 301 My remarks were received with complete indifference. Even Lou merely shrugged her shoulders, and looked at Lamus as much as to say, ‘‘ You see I was right.” Lamus slowly shook his head. As a matter of fact, I could hardly see. My eyesight was disturbed in some peculiar way which frightened me, and my heart began to protest. I took out the cocaine once more. To my astonishment, Lamus bounded from his chair and took the bottle from my hands. I wanted to get up and kill him ; but a deathly faintness seized me. The room swam. …
1922 · PDF PAGE 273
King Lamus Intervenes 259 was still a faint smell of bitter almond in the air. It reminded me of how the dinner might have ended, and I trembled all over like a man in an ague fit. What was happening in me? Had I suddenly fallen in love with life, or had I simply become aware of the fear of death ? When we reached the fresh air, I knew it was the former. Lamus had made me feel. The effect of the drug had been to kill all feelingin me. My impulse to kill myself had not been so wholly negative’as I had thought. It was a positive craving for what …
1922 · PDF PAGE 49
…is eyes. ‘ “A case of indiscretion,’ he observed, with bitter irony. For the next quarter of an hour he fought for the girl’s life. King Lamus was a very skilled physician, though he had never studied medicine officially. But I was not aware of what was going on. Cocaine was singing in my veins. I cared for nothing. Lou came over impulsively and flung herself across my knees. She held the goblet of Benedictine to my mouth, chanting ecstatically :-— “Q Thou sparkling wine-cup of light, whose foaming is the heart’s blood of the stars! I adore The…
1922 · PDF PAGE 175
Short Commons 161 but the words wouldn’t come. King Lamus went to him and took his hand. ‘ Drugs are the slope in front of us,” he said, ‘‘ and I’m wily old Eckenstein, and you're ambitious young Lamus. And I say ‘stop!’ and when you show me that you can stop, when you have picked yourself together and are standing on the slope laughing, I'll show you how to go on.” We knew at the back of our minds that the man was inexorable. We hated him as the weak always hate the strong, and we had to respect and admire him, detesting him all the more for t…
1922 · PDF PAGE 312
…feel that something urgent was on hand. I didn’t like the way Lou was acting. She stayed so absolutely still and silent, it was uncanny. Lamus had taken three matches to light his pipe and it kept on going out between almost every puff. By- and-by he threw it angrily on the carpet and lighted a cigar. There was a club fender round the grate. Maisie was sitting on it swinging her legs impatiently. We all seemed to be waiting for something to happen and it was as if nobody knew where to begin. “ Tell him, Lou,” said Lamus suddenly. She started as…
1922 · PDF PAGE 280
…6 The Diary of a Drug Fiend of keeping each other up to the mark in the matter of recording the facts. I discovered what had amused King Lamus on the first occasion. I was conscious of a distinct shade of annoyance at having to get up and make a little cross. It had never occurred to me to break my word. There was a fascination in watching the record. The drive was a revelation. It was like coming out of a charnel house into the fresh air. A keen cold wind beat against our faces, almost blinding us. It was not until we reached the inn that we r…
1922 · PDF PAGE 174
…he point of the anecdote. He felt his manhood shamed that he was in the power of this blind black craving. He didn’t really believe that Lamus was telling the truth. He thought the man had risked his life to get those coolies across. It seemed impossible that a man could possess such absolute power and confidence. In other words, he judged King Lamus by himself. He knew himself not to be a first-rate airman. He had flattered himself that he had dared so many dangers. It cut him like a whip that Lamus should despise what people call the heroic a…
1922 · PDF PAGE 278
… to make a cross in the proper space every time you take it.” The condition was easy enough. What we had been dreading, in spite of what Lamus had said, was the forcible suppression which we had experienced at Barley Grange, and which had brought us to such extremities. | But Lala’s last remark removed all our apprehensions. The matter was left entirely in our own hands. All we were asked was to keep a record of what we were doing. , I couldn’t see how the fact of putting a thing down could make any difference to the act itself. At that moment …
1922 · PDF PAGE 47
…O Thou naked virgin of love, that art caught in a net of wild roses! I adore Thee, Evoe! I adore Thee, I A O!” ‘‘ Quite so,” agreed King Lamus cheerfully. “ You'll excuse me, I know, if I ask whether you have any great experience of the effects of cocaine.” Lou glowered at him. I preferred to meet him frankly. I deliberately put a large dose on the back of my hand and sniffed it up. Before I had finished, the effect had occurred. I felt myself any man’s master. “Well, as a matter of fact,’’ I said superciliously, “ to-night’s the first time I e…
1922 · PDF PAGE 311
CHAPTER IV OUT OF HARM’S WAY Lamus’s motor was at the door. Maisie sprang to the wheel and drove off without saying a word. I shivered at her side, filled with inexplicable qualms. The exaltation of the cocaine had completely left me. It seemed to increase my nervousness; and yet I resorted to it again and again during the short drive. When we got to the studio, Lala was sitting as usual at the desk, but Lamus was walking up and down the room with his hands behind his back; his head bowed in thought so deep that he seemed not to notice our arri…
1922 · PDF PAGE 14
CHAP. IT. 199 IV. VI. Vit. Contents BOOK III—PURGATORIO KING LAMUS INTERVENES FIRST AID THE VOICE OF VIRTUE OUT OF HARM’S WAY AT TELEPYLUS THE TRUE WILL LOVE UNDER WILL PAGE 247 262 280 297 315 333 348
1922 · PDF PAGE 275
King Lamus Intervenes 261 advantage of the fact to watch your discomfort as if it were somebody else. When you find that you can enjoy this instead of blindly rushing to heroin for relief, you will already have gone a long way in the direction of acquiring mental control.”’ Several times during the night Lala intervened vigorously in such a way that it was impossible for us not to give her our attention. We found out later that this was part of the plan, that we were being watched for symptoms of acute disquietude, and that whenever these appea…
1922 · PDF PAGE 184
…an anything they do, whoever they are. Here comes Peter Pan. He hasn’t grown old after We had a gorgeous feed at the dear old café. King Lamus came up to our table but he only said a few words. “So you got it, I see.” Cockie gave him one back. “T hate to injure your reputation as a prophet, Mr. Lamus, but it isn’t stopping when you have to stop. I’ve got it, as you say, and now, with your kind per- mission, I’m going to show you that we can stop.” Lamus changed his manner like a flash. His con- temptuous smile became like sunrise in spring. — “…
1922 · PDF PAGE 46
…d it. “That accounts for what the world has always done —made martyrs of its pioneers.”’ I felt a little ashamed, to tell the truth; but Lamus put me at my ease. He waved his hand towards a huge arm-chair covered with Persian tapestries. He gave me a cigarette and lighted it for me. He poured out a drink of Benedictine into a huge curved glass, and put it on a little table by my side. I disliked his easy hospitality as much as anything else. I had an uncomfortable feeling that I was a puppet in his hands. There was only one other person in the …
1922 · PDF PAGE 320
…y of a Drug Fiend it, in its turn, becomes a measure of the grandeur of the rock. We walked up from the station to the residence of King Lamus, high on the hillside above the neck of Jand which joins it to the rock. The cliffs towered above us. They were torn into huge pinnacles and gullies ; but above the terrific precipices we could see the remains of successive civilisations ; Greek temples, Roman walls, Saracen cisterns, Norman gateways, and houses of all periods were perishing slowly on the gaunt, parched crags. It was very hard work for L…
1922 · PDF PAGE 32
… under a complex and fantastic system of police administration nearly as pernicious as anything even in America. “Don’t apologise,” said Lamus to the waiter in a tone of icy detachment. “ This is the freedom we fought for.”’ I was entirely on the side of the speaker. I hadn't wanted a drink all evening, but now I was told I couldn’t have one, I wanted to raid their damn cellars and fight the Metropolitan Police and go up in my ‘plane and drop a few bombs on the silly old House of Commons. And yet I was in no sort of sympathy with the man. The c…
1922 · PDF PAGE 321
…nt to fulfil even that last of human ambitions: the acquiring of the good will of prosperous travellers. “Don’t be downhearted,” laughed Lamus. ‘“ Your trouble is that you are looking for permanence in the wrong place. Do you see those two men?” On the road below us were two goatherds, one driving his flock up from the town after having been milked, the other driving them down for that p , Lamus quoted two lines of Greek poetry. I did not remember enough to be able to translate them, but the words had an extraordinarily familiar ring. Lamus tra…
1922 · PDF PAGE 345
…and the population could depend on rainfall instead of having to cluster in the neighbourhood of springs and streams for its water. King Lamus tied himself on the middle of a rope with Dionysus at one end and Hermes at the other; while we, under the guidance of Cypris and Athena, toiled up the goat track which made a zigzag on the grassy tongue. Their party attacked the rock buttress on our right. King Lamus made Hermes lead up the most astonish- ingly precipitous crags, with little advice and no assistance. But his hand was always within reach…
1922 · PDF PAGE 271
King Lamus [ntervenes 257 -“ Hardly a salubrious neighbourhood,” he remarked. “T think we ought to celebrate the occasion by making a night of it in my studio, and to-morrow morning we must see about getting you some decent rooms.” I remembered that our supply of heroin was in Greek Street. “You know, Lamus,’”’ I stammered, ‘‘ I’m ashamed to admit it, but we really can’t get on without H. We ‘tried—in fact, once we got clean away—but we couldn’t - possibly go through that again.” _-“ Nothing to be ashamed of, my dear man,” returned our physicia…
1922 · PDF PAGE 281
…s of its own. Two mighty yew trees stood one on either side of the gate. Lala told us that the place belonged to the Order of which King Lamus was the head, and that he occasionally sent people down here for certain parts of his training which could only be carried out in solitude and silence. A great longing came upon me to experience the subtle peace which indwelt this simple habitation. For some reason or other I felt a natural disinclination to take the dose of heroin which was offered to me. It seemed out of keeping with the spirit of the …