Thelema ScholarTHE ALEISTER CROWLEY COLLECTION
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1904 · PDF PAGE 63

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

dribble of three drops of the precious fluid soaked into her mug, and tickled up the ulcers of her throat. I was again a man. How inscrutable are the Ways of the Almighty ! From those three drops came my three sons ! Leila, her uvula irritated by the acrid fire of my ex- travagance, coughed it up and out. The three drops fell respectively upon the pouting bird’s nests of three Nunnery hacks, who happened to be frigging themselves with no fear of the future ! Nemesis overtook them ! One and all conceived and bare sons and called their names Jesu…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 126

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

Celia I When Celia frigs my fat J.T., Her mouth is luscious as a pig’s : I come three times in minutes three When Celia frigs. But when she fucks, what randy jigs She dances on my stiff pee-wee ! I leave plain buggery to prigs ! Her twat is deeper than the sea ; Her ulcers are like rotten figs ; — It is a holy time for me When Celia frigs. II When Celia spends I send a card Inviting all my oldest friends To tea, if they can get a hard When Celia spends. It should be easy to make ends Meet, O good comrades of the bard ! Her twat gapes wide : wha…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 131

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…wins is a fraud, Triplets split yer arse, Yer bet yer bloody Gawd ! One Gawd’s Deism ; Two’s Manichee ; We’re bloody Prodestunts, We run three. Some’s ’appy Cawthlics : Cuckolds an’ ’ores They like : in consikence Five they adores. All little buggers What’s gawt any sense ’Itches on a dildo, And damns the expense. [133]

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1904 · PDF PAGE 129

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

… clay to clay When Celia croaks. I’ll dress her up in cloaks and toques Etcetera, earn her away And after sundry final pokes Hire her at three-and-six a day To G...H... — what a hoax ! “ None but the dead ” shall have its way When Celia croaks. X When Celia rots, each poxy hole Will serve : she hath an hundred twats. Come finger, tongue, and fucking pole When Celia rots. Here, the old ulcers ! Happy spots ! Hail, pustules ! Hail, oh central goal Wherein some sucking devil squats Now surely as ever ! Broke the bowl. Loosed the old cord — yet hop…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 33

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…or some days my ponderous and unwieldy bollocks had become turgid and swollen with the fluid we know, my boy, you dog ! As spunk. Eighty-three pounds and four ounces they weighed on the penny-in-the-slot machine at our village station, and had it not been for the singular ro- bustness of my physique, unenervated by de- bauch, I should have seen myself condemned to share the unenviable lot of the Samoan with ele- phantiasis of the scrotum, and support my too generous endowments with a wheelbarrow. Fortu- nately this extreme measure was not requi…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 70

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

… at a single mo- ment. Before the woman fainted, the overseer gave the word to stop. She was a young and modest girl, and at his signal, three huge negroes bounded upon her. Heedless of her cries and tears they plunged their reeking arse openers into her dainty

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1904 · PDF PAGE 44

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…ieked and fainted, suspecting magic. Re- covering herself by a great effort, she caught hold of the traitor’s bollocks, and went on. For three

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1904 · PDF PAGE 36

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…laxed its agonizing pres- sure, and in one rush of boiling tapioca pudding I emptied my eighty odd pounds into her cloak- room, drowning three innocent old gentlemen, and the maid who looked after their hats and sticks. It was too much for her capacity : the internal pres- sure of so much liquor neutralized that of her now wearied India-rubber-plant, and I was able at lei- sure to achieve the fourteen fucks and a dry-bob which I had originally contemplated. Amid the plaudits of the entire assembly I withdrew my dripping banana from her now yawn…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 85

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…o his olive neck. And then the luxurious confession with which this story be- gan. Left to himself, Clayton invented incidentally twenty-three quite new curses, called Le W... a lit- tle bitch, kissed the mark of the little bitch’s teeth on his hand, and generally conducted himself as an officer and a gentleman would do, provided he were also a devout Christian. He foresaw trou- ble. It came pretty quickly. Two days afterwards Clayton had to quit his lover’s room in a great hurry, as heavy footsteps trod the passage. The Captain was in his dres…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 27

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…the palm of his hand by his thumb. His forefinger tickled Bobine’s clitoris, and between his third and fourth fingers Dick’s best leg of three vibrated. Clara’s medlar got a fair share of fun out of his knuckles. With is left arm it was the same, substi- tuting the names of Dora, Edward, Frank, Ethel, George and Fanny. Gertie and Herminia seized each one of his shoulder blades in their gaping cabbage-fields, while Imogen and Jenny were en- gaged with his elbow joints. Harry and Isaac had their drumsticks in his mouth ; Katherine got a nose-fuck…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 48

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…he spending anonyma fainted with pleasure, and the cautious Kluckchoo withdrew, only to be summoned in all haste to the royal apartments three days later, when Mrs Arthur disclosed her find to her keeper. To make a long story short, the K..g was so de- lighted with the Appendix-fuck of Kluckchoo, that he did absolutely nothing else all day and all night. Affairs of state went by the board, and to the cringing official who dared to remind him of his approaching coronation, he replied : Bugger the Coronation ! This language shocked the prudish En…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 11

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…e wrote the “ Nameless Novel.” All this time of his marriage, about two years, he had been also performing miracles of pi- ety. Ordained three years before, he rapidly gained the favour of his superiors by his modesty and elo- quence. He obtained a valuable private chaplaincy in Paris, a most suitable post, allowing him plenty of leisure for other work. During this period a deli- cious volume of hymns came from his pen, and his self-sacrificing ministrations to the poor were the wonder of the French capital. His evenings were spent in that witt…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 83

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…rew would have him- self preferred this choice, arguing that Andrew could never be really enamoured of so vicious a boy, but what he saw three weeks after undeceived him. On this wise. One night the Captain, being restless, sug- gested a tour of inspection, and the two lovers stole quietly out of their cabin. They came after a time to where Andrew and Ambrose were, and were lucky enough to catch the former in the very act of sacrificing at the most holy altar, while the boy, turned half round, was gently chewing and licking the armpit of the pe…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 47

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…y ! Nor the shadow of it. Do that to me, dear heart ! Cried the randy Moll Muckmeabart. Not I, said the expert, you would not get up for three days and more : such is the pleasure. This made her only the keener, and when he saw that she would cry a rape unless he consented — “ and you must see, darling, how necessary it is for anyone in my posi- tion to be able to do that at any moment — the witnesses are all ready, and you would not stand a chance ! ” — He abandoned the unequal con- test ; and the unique performance of Kluckchoo, the Human Cor…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 41

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…She sighed ; shut your mug and open your urethra, and get on with the bum tickling, can’t you ? (I give you my word I had not spoken for three days and more.) But argu- ment is proverbially vain with a woman in the middle of a rousing bacon-rubbing. I blocked steadily on. In vain I had cudgelled my wits to find some substitute for the fatiguing exercise of rump- ing ; but the surgeon warned me that the sugges- tion would be taken in ill part. Her Majesty, he explained, is before all things respectable : not to save life, no ! Not to ensure the …

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1904 · PDF PAGE 52

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…But all phrases are weak. It was Nature’s standing miracle.) — which, as you will observe, is ninety-seven yards, two feet, and four and three quarter inches in length — it is the sor- row of my life that I have never touched the 100 yard mark ! — And standing in a long row, began to frig and suck it madly. As you can see, I can coil and uncoil it at pleasure : I can wind myself up in it : I could hang myself in it if the whim took me. I have dipped it in treacle, and given a Sunday- School treat which the children will remember for years — the…

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1904 · PDF PAGE 56

Snowdrops from a Curate’s Garden

…lness of this description, for I know the swine well enough, and in no other than a book of filth would I have introduced any one of the three. Ed.) my artis- tic studies progressed but slowly, for much of my time was occupied with a liaison I had formed with Stephen Jimson, to whom the Ode (infra) is ad- dressed. This youth had the peculiar facility of spotting sodomites in the most unlikely places. He would in a short walk along the boulevard recog- nize as confreres in homosexual vice some ninety- five percent of the passers by. He was not h…

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