The Equinox (Volume I, Number IV)

September 29th. 12.0 mn. IL15-11.41 am. a.m. 30th. 10.5 am. October. Ist. 5.30 p.m. 9.30 p.m. THE EQUINOX Dharana on Ajna and “Aum Tat Sat Aum” thirty-one minutes. At one time Ajna seemed enormously, perhaps infinitely, elongated. Mantra “Aum Tat Sat Aum” with usual throbbing. Took 210 drops of Laudanum as an experiment under MAitrananda’s guidance. (Absolutely no mental result, and hardly any physical result. I must be most resistant to this drug, which I had never previously taken). Recovering from the Laudanum. Pranayama and Dharana hopeless.* Another month of this great work commences, and though the toil has not been wasted the reward indeed seems still far off. On the first of the month P. writes:— “Blessed be thou, O Bhavani, O Isis my Sister, my Bride, my Mother! Blessed be Thou, O Shiva, O Amoun, Concealed of the Concealed. By Thy most secret and Holy Name of Apophis be Thou blessed, Lucifer, Star of the Dawn, Satan- Jeheshua, Light of the World! Blessed be Thou, Buddha, Osiris, by whatever Name I call Thee Thou art nameless to Eternity. Blessed be Thou, O Day, that Thou hast risen in the Night of Time; First Dawn in the Chaos of poor P.’s poor mind! Accursed be Thou, Jehovah, Brahma, unto the Aeons of Aeons: thou who didst create Darkness and not Light! Mara, vile Mask of Matter! Arise, O Shiva, and destroy! That in destruction these at last be blest. Pranayama. Mantra seventeen minutes. Noise of glass being rubbed persistent. From now I decide to work more seriously, and follow out the following programme: Mantra “ Aum Tat Sat Aum.” Dharana on Ajna Chakkra. Read Bhagavad-Gita. Vegetarian diet. * Probably at this time a period of “dryness” supervened. 164